Florien’s General Thoughts
I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what else to do.
My hands won’t stop trembling. What have I gotten myself into? I’m not brave, I feel like everything is falling apart and I haven’t done enough to fix things. This city is my home, I don’t want to see it fall to ruin and chaos. I don’t want this place that has ruined my memories of family to tear apart what I have with my friends. With them, I was me. A bumbling, idiotic mess of mistakes and hesitation, but I was me. Florien.
What good does being that fool do now? My family was right, I was always too much of a coward. I keep running from my troubles, hiding behind anything to deny the man I knew I was becoming. Head of the Wolfric family, a title I once pursued myself. It’s not mine any longer, thank the gods. But my brother looks so tired, like the world has driven its weight onto his shoulders without rest. I have to help him. I have to make up for what I did.
… She’s going to be furious with me. But she’ll understand, I hope.
I have betrayed myself—my family, everyone around me. I left, thinking that my absence would make things easier, but instead I made things worse. Have I ever done anything to earn my family’s approval? I never made them proud, did I? I caused trouble, I made Father worry—
Oh. Right. He’s gone.
He was so disappointed in me that night. The look in his eyes haunts me, and yet, Faust says he preferred me? I, who have done so little to be part of this family, who ran away, who caused so much grief. I’m sorry, Father. I’m sorry I wasn’t there, I didn’t get to say my goodbyes. Even on your deathbed you worried for me. If I had been there, if I wasn’t such a troublemaker… All I have left of you are my memories, as hazy as some of them are, and my last name.
You wanted an heir. I did not think you wanted a son too.
Florien’s Thoughts on the group
Tarvo
I wonder how he’s doing in the cell. At least he’s healed up, safe where he is. Oh Tarvo, everything is such a fucking mess. It feels like at every corner or crossroads something happens and everything gets worse.
I want to laugh in disbelief, find someone to blame. But blame is only an easy way out. You got us into this situation, and I recklessly tried to save you. At some point, I could only watch with horrified bemusement at everything unfolding.
How could it go so wrong?
I wish I could ask you to ask Adam if he sees a way out.
Kerrick
Well, it seems he was justified in his suspicion after all. I hope I can explain myself, but I—
Wait. I still don’t know what was up with Kerrick and that eerie conversation. He may be untrusting of me, but he hides his own secrets too. I won’t pry any further, but until we resolve our hidden questions, I fear he will never believe I’m the person I say I am.
I’m sure he’s with Rona right now. For some reason, that fills me with some relief. Please keep her safe, old man. If there’s anyone in Waterdeep I trust with this task, it’s you. Don’t let me down.
Rona
I did this for you—at least, that’s what I try to tell myself. Deep down, I did this for myself. Whatever wounds have reopened since I stepped in this city have not healed. I am a coward, Rona. Once more I’m hiding behind a name that isn’t mine.
But this time is different. I hope you can see that. I don’t know if I can tell you about my choice, if you would even listen to what I have to say. Please trust me on this. Call me names, be angry with me when we meet again, but trust me. It is time for me to pick a side, and you know I cannot pick yours.
The rebels see me as Faust, no matter how I dress or carry myself. You see me as Florien, a man who is marred by his incompetence. I don’t want that to be the person you know me as. I want to be capable for you too.
I was scared to meet him Rona. But now… I’m scared of what you might say. I’m bracing myself already.
It’s for the greater good. Let me believe that my choice was made for the better.
Florien’s Thoughts on specific NPCs
Faust
We are so alike that it hurts. You and I, who used to be so close. You hate looking at yourself, always reminded of me. I flinch at my reflection— all I see is you. Tell me, would we be so undone if we were raised as equals?
You shouted at me, in a tone so filled with anger that I’m familiar with. I couldn’t meet your gaze. I couldn’t years ago, and I still cannot now. I’m sure you see me as pathetic, showing so much weakness and uncertainty.
I hate it too. I have let myself feel too much, instead of too little.
You want me to become you once more. Not a shadow, but an extension of yourself. Will you regret this? No, you probably won’t. You know how hard I’ll work to make sure I don’t fuck up again. I spent years apart from you. Eight years, or was it ten? I don’t know. But I heard your voice and Father’s in my head with every mistake I made. Even living as Sariel, I never felt free. Our surname hung over my head like a warrant, and I never dared to claim it for myself. I’m sure you know how well that went the first time.
Is it really so surprising that I never saw myself as the preferred one? You know what Father said to me that night. You know how Mother looked at me with disdain. The elders. Even the servants of the household, the whispers in secret. What a waste of time and effort, they’d said.
Don’t make me laugh, Faust. They never preferred either of us. We were born only to fulfil the role of an heir. You wanted this role as much as I did in the past. I thought I would never understand this devotion you have to your duties—but I see now that there’s something else there. You just want to be accepted, don’t you? One failure means the potential of being cast away. Our family’s reputation, gone just like that.
… I shouldn’t have left you to deal with this alone.
No matter how capable you are, you are still like me. I’ve seen you afraid, I’ve seen you overwhelmed. You don’t show it anymore, but we’re twins. It is not just our faces that bear that similarity.
Whatever happens next, I will be there with you.